Chocolate Chocolate Cookies

I have a hard time with balance, not as in I fall down the stairs (though my wii fit thought I might, and said so frequently), but just within myself. I'm very critical of myself (aren't we all?) and I tend to think in terms of one thing versus another, right or wrong, healthy or unhealthy, runner or walker- there is no blurring of lines in my mind. Either it is, or I am, or it isn't, and I'm not.  I'm realizing this makes my internal dialogue very bipolar and manic. One minute everything is great and I'm just dandy and the next minute everything I thought a minute ago is held in question.

For example, I am trying my best to eat nutritious, wholesome foods. I try to share those things with you. In those moments I feel successful and healthy. I'm pleased as punch with myself and I feel motivated to continue moving forward with all my healthy endeavors. If I find myself aimlessly munching on something with unidentifiable ingredients or, as happened this past week, an ooey gooey delicious fried food dipped in some amazing sauce, well then I just feel crummy and I become immediately 'unhealthy' and unkind to myself.

This is no big, unusual thing. I hear there are a lot of people who are, like me, harder on themselves than they would be to even their nemesis (though my particular nemesis would be a photocopy machine and I do think terrible, terrible things about it. I'm not sure what I think matters to that particularly menacing and minute munching machine. Though, if it could scream, I'm sure I'd take all those hateful ideas about stripping it for parts back.).

My number one new years resolution (it takes me a while to decide these things) is to be as kind to myself as I would be to others. I'm hoping to start that off by working on my sense of balance, taking the good with the bad and living with it all. Admitting that there is no grey area in my mind, and also admitting that in life things are often blurry and yet oddly balanced. Balance. A little bit of that grey area. It's what I think I need. A bit of everything and some well rounded expectations of myself.

Three ways: rolled in sugar (little guys), rolled in chocolate chip type things (big ones) and just a plain cookie.

These chocolate cookies represent a sort of off kilter yet lovely balance to me. Isn't that poetic and fortunate? They are devilshly delicious; deep and dark and chocolatey in the most amazing way. Yet, they are made with a whole grain- spelt flour- and are almost utterly unprocessed. Does that make them healthy? Oh goodness no. But I feel a sense of both whole grain goodness and amazing worthwhile tastes in these beauts.

The reaction to these cookies blew me away, I'm keeping them on my rotation and definitely bringing them around whenever I think a dark, intense chocolatey cookie would balance a situation out.

rolled in little chocolate chips, these were good, but sugar was better!

Chocolate Chocolate Cookies
adapted from Good to the Grain

ingredients

8 ounces (2 sticks) of unsalted butter
16 ounces of dark chocolate or bittersweet chocolate (70% cacao), split into two groups (one for melting and one for chunks in the dough)
4 eggs
2 1/4 cups granulated or raw sugar (plus extra for finishing)
2 cups spelt flour
1 tablespoon plus 1 teaspoon baking powder
2 teaspoons kosher salt

To begin, melt the butter and half of the chocolate (8 ounces) in a double boiler or a microwave until they are melted together and mixed well.

Next, add the eggs and the sugar to a large bowl, or the bowl of a mixer if you are so fortunate, and mix well (high speed) for 3 minutes until it gets thick. Mix the warm chocolate in and use a spatula to get all the chocolate and egg/sugar off the sides of the bowl.

Sift the dry ingredients into a bowl, pouring any leftover grains and bits back into the mix. Mix the dry ingredients with the chocolate mixture and stir well. Add the remaining chopped chocolate and continue mixing until everything is mixed well.

Refrigerate the dough for 2 hours and up to 3 days. When you are ready to bake, preheat the oven to 350 degrees and place parchment paper on your cookie sheets. Begin rolling the dough into large tablespoon sized balls, rolling them lightly in sugar before placing them on the cookie sheets. You can also roll them in cacao nibs, or leave them plain. I preferred the sugar.) Leave 2-3 inches between the cookies, as they will collide if you do not.

Bake the cookies for 15-19 minutes, until the edges are firm but the middle still soft. Cool on the parchment or a cooking rack.

Enjoy!
-m

Flax Seed Whole Wheat Bread

Don't lie, you know you love bread. Anyone who says otherwise is lying. Sometimes we 'hate' bread because we have discovered that you really shouldn't eat it at every meal and well, especially for white breads or breads with a base of bleached, white flour, they aren't very nutritious on their own. Does that usually stop us? Sometimes, but not always. I know some people who have successfully given up almost entirely on eating bread and are healthier for it, but this is not one of those breads to hate. Or bread doughs, because it is so much more than bread.

I've decided- this is a bread to love. This is no summer fling bread. You can bring this bread home to momma. You love it and it loves you in return- because it has some good stuff in it and it tastes so darn good. And, it's flexible. It's not just bread dough- you can make anything bready and carby with it- they suggest hamburger buns. I suggest pizza. See below.

Liquids that will soon be poured into the tub above and mixed

I've talked about this type of bread before- the now pretty famous "5 minutes a day" type. I bought the "Healthy Bread in Five Minutes a Day" recently and have been trying it out. This is my new favorite- I added flax seed to it, just because I totally can, and I'm glad I did for a really silly reason. It's kind of pretty. It adds such a nice little fleck of color- I don't even really mind that it also adds some health benefits! Omega 3's- How about gorgeous contrast!

It's described as sandwich bread your kids will love and I chose to make it because the other recipes I had tried seemed like they needed something to fire back at the yeasty bite I was receiving-I thought a bit of honey would do the trick and when I stumbled upon this recipe in the cookbook, I was ecstatic.

This makes making bread so so easy. You just mix a few things, let it sit, then make a loaf and let it sit some more. Then bake and enjoy! The dough lasts in your fridge for up to 5 days. I highly suggest any of their books if you are even remotely intrigued and if you think you can't- then I think you must. 

Flax Seed Whole Wheat Bread 
adapted from Healthy Bread in Five Minutes a Day

makes 2 (2lb) loaves (if making loaf bread) or 4 (12 inch) pizzas

5 cups whole wheat flour
2 cups all purpose flour
1/2 cup flaxseed meal (ground flax seed- you can buy it ground up or grind it up yourself- try the coffee grinder!)
1 tablespoon kosher salt (adjust to taste, and use less if you are using Morton's)
1/4 cup vital wheat gluten
2 1/2 cups warm water
1/2 cup honey
5 large eggs
2/3 cup melted unsalted butter (or use a neutral oil)

While the title suggests this will take only five minutes, the waiting time is much longer, the prep time is though- just five minutes. These are the steps, you will want to make this ahead of time.

Mix all the dry ingredients in a large bowl or a lidded (not air-tight) tupperware/food container. I use a large, rectangular container that used to hold granola bars in my pantry. Be sure to really stir this dry mixture around, getting the wheat gluten all mixed up with everything else.

Next, mix all the wet ingredients in a separate bowl and then pour them into the container with the dry ingredients. Mix this up well, getting all the dry stuff mixed in well. You may need to use wet hands to get it all.

And really, that is it for preparing the bread. That's the 5 minutes aspect of it, in my opinion. Now, let it sit with the lid on (or plastic wrap on the bowl, but don't make it air tight) and let it rise and collapse. Do not punch the dough down.

The dough can be used right away, or you can refrigerate it and use it over the next 5 days.

How do you want to use it? 

Loaf of Delicious Bread: 

Lightly grease a loaf pan (8x4ish). Dust the surface of the dough and pull off a cantaloupe sized piece (should be about half of the dough). Dust a little more flour on the top and quickly pull it into a ball, as they show you here:  

It will be bigger than the ball he has here, and should fill your loaf pan about 3/4 of the way. Let it rest for 90 minutes in a warm place. I opted to put a little melted butter on the top of my loaf before baking it, just a note.

About 60-75 minutes into the resting, preheat the oven to 350 degrees. When the oven is preheated and the 90 minute rest period is up- bake the bread for 45-50 minutes, or until it is golden brown. Adjust your baking time if you made a smaller or larger loaf. Allow the bread to cool before serving.

Pizza: 

Preheat the oven to 550 degrees (or 500 if that is the highest your oven will go) and place your baking stone near the bottom third of the oven. I use a terra cotta pot bottom for my baking stone- and have for years. Much cheaper!


Dust the surface of the dough and pull off a grapefruit sized piece, as shown in the video above, and shape it into a ball. Sprinkle some cornmeal or flour on your cutting board or pizza peel. Shape the pizza on the board/peel and top as you feel fit. Slide it into the oven (you may need a few shakes of the hand to wiggle it off the peel) and turn on the exhaust fan, because things will get a bit smokey with that flour or cornmeal flying into a hot oven.

Bake for 8-10 minutes, check it at 8 and go from there. Allow the pizza to cool a bit before serving.

Other? Get the book! You won't regret it.

Enjoy!
-m

Homemade Soft Pretzels

 When I was a goofy little kid, my sisters and I used to beg for frozen soft pretzels. Or, I think we did, because every time I pass them in the freezer section of the grocery store I think 'I want! You can't have! I want! You can't have!'. 
Yes, sometimes we did slyly convince our parents to let us gobble some up. They were so satisfying and easy to heat up for a quick snack. It was such fun. Don't they remind you of a festival, theme park or other outdoor mildly summery gathering? They make me happy. Little bit of mustard, lots of napkins and a good sprinkling of salt and I'm in heaven. I love soft pretzels, but I had no idea how much I loved them until I had a fresh one at a farmers market a few years ago. Ever since then, those frozen ones haven't been on my mind at all. They don't tempt me the way they used to, not in the slightest. Nope. Not at all. (Am I convincing you?)

foamy yeast mixture

Then, last year, I found a recipe for them online and after reading through it, I decided that I had what it takes to make my very own soft pretzels from scratch. That first recipe was good, but it left me with an odd stomach ache and the pretzels weren't great the next day. I've been searching for a replacement ever since, and I have found it. I'm done searching. Hold off the hounds, here's the winner.

boiling- aren't those strange little bubbles?

If you are going to a super bowl party, or other festivities where major snacks are involved, I suggest you rock everyone's socks by making a batch of these. Seriously, everyone will think you are some sort of unicorn herding opera singer- that's how amazing they are! Don't tell me you wouldn't be impressed by that, or think it was unbelievable- because that is exactly what people will think when you bring these bad boys over! They won't believe you (hence the unicorns) and they will be amazed (hence the opera singing). My thinking totally makes sense now, doesn't it? Whip up a little cheese dip and you will have an absolute show stopper.

this is after their boil bath and before they were baked

Let me just mention this: These are way easy. Don't be fooled by the boiling step, it's easy peasy.

If you can mix some things, let them sit, kind of oddly fold things (or make pretzel sticks! Or pretzel bites! or what else? I'm dying to find other ways to use this recipe- I made pretzel rolls! Great for sandwiches or burgers!), toss said oddly folded things into boiling water for 30 seconds, take them out and bake them- then you are set. It's just that easy. I feel like I'm selling some cleaning product, but I don't know how else to say it- make. these. now. or at least soon. Then, thank me. Or thank Alton Brown, it is his fault after all.

Soft Pretzels
from Alton Brown 

ingredients

1 1/2 cups warm (110 to 115 degrees F) water
1 tablespoon sugar
2 teaspoons kosher salt
1 package active dry yeast
22 ounces all-purpose flour, approximately 4 1/2 cups
2 ounces unsalted butter, melted
Vegetable oil, for pan
10 cups water
2/3 cup baking soda
1 large egg yolk beaten with 1 tablespoon water
Pretzel salt (optional)

Mix the water, sugar and kosher salt in the bowl of a stand mixer, if you have one, and sprinkle the yeast on top. Let it sit for a bit, about 5 minutes, until it begins to foam. Then add the flour and butter and using the dough hook, mix it slowly until combined. (If you don't have stand mixer, no worries, mix it by hand! Work it!) Ramp it up to medium speed until the dough gets smooth and forms a ball- it should not be sticking to the sides of the bowl- about 4-5 minutes. Take the dough out and quickly clean the bowl, spray it with vegetable oil and return the dough to the bowl. Cover it with plastic wrap and put it in a warm place for about 50 minutes or until it has doubled in size. 

Now, preheat the oven to 450 degrees. Line two sheet pans with parchment paper and a little vegetable oil.

Put the water and the baking soda in a large saucepan and bring it to a boil. While you wait for this, start working with the dough on an oiled surface. Divide it into 8 equal pieces for large pretzels, 16 for mini pretzels. Make a U-shape with the dough, then cross over each end to connect with the opposite side. Or make pretzel sticks, or rolls, or bites. Whatever you please! Just adjust baking time if you do. 

Put the pretzels one by one into the boiling water for about 30 seconds each. Remove them using a slotted spoon or spatula and place them on the prepared sheet pans. Brush them with the egg yolk/water mixture and sprinkle with salt if you wish. Bake them until they are a dark brown color, about 12-14 minutes. Let cool for a few minutes before serving.

Enjoy!

-m

Peanut Butter and Dark Chocolate Bars

I'm filing a name change for these beauts, I no longer want these particular things to be called 'bars'. It seems oddly derogatory. They are so much more than a bar, they are just lovely. That's it. I want to rename them 'Peanut Butter Lovelies'. Yes, please. 

I didn't set out to make Peanut Butter Lovelies (when you say it, you have to kind of swivel your head around and point your chin up a bit, they are just so lovely, now say it with me 'peanut butter lovelies'. yes yes.). I just wanted to make some cookies. I had peanut butter and this honking pound of chocolate and I thought, well why not make some of our favorite peanut butter chocolate chunk cookies?

Because I hate chopping chocolate, that's why not. It took me a few hours of hemming and hawing  (those are words, right? They look so ridiculous, just the way I probably do whilst saying 'peanut butter lovelies' just the way that I imagine John Cleese would) before I just decided to do it. I had recently had a bit of a chocolate/glass disaster that I was aiming to avoid, but I didn't let it stop me. No way, so what if I caused an inept glass bowl full of chocolate I had so willingly chopped to shatter to pieces on my stove and so what if I left the mess wrapped up in a garbage bag in the sink in the garage that caused a minor flood, psh, so what. No big deal.

I wish I had thought that. Instead I thought, good luck crazy. Then I started chopping chocolate and hating every minute of it. The catastrophist in me just sees the way the blade slips along the hard chocolate, hardly following my commands, and worries about my dainty fingers. I like to let my mind wander whenever I can and this is not one of those times. No way, chopping chocolate requires constant vigilance, of which I have very little. I'm easily distracted, so sue me.

I just want to take a nap on this. Who doesn't?

But these Peanut Butter Lovelies (now you have to use a British accent as well when you say it, come on! you know you want to!) were worth the effort. I didn't want to ball up a bunch of cookies, and so it became a large bar. The melted chocolate on the top was the kicker, the dark chocolate and peanut butter combination being one of my all time favorites. While I thoroughly enjoyed these lovelies, next time I'm adding pretzels. Yes, pretzels. To the top, right after I pour that divine chocolate over the pillowy cooked cookie dough. You should try that, and let me know just how amazing it is.

Peanut Butter and Dark Chocolate Bars or Peanut Butter Lovelies
inspired by The Village Baker's Wife Peanut Butter Chocolate Chunk Cookies

print this recipe

ingredients

1 cup butter (two sticks) at room temperature
1 cup peanut butter (your choice!) room temperature
1 cup sugar
3/4 cup firmly packed brown sugar
2 eggs
1 teaspoon pure vanilla extract
2 cups all purpose flour
1 teaspoon baking soda
15-20 ounces of dark chocolate, cut into 1/2 in chunks (1 pound or so)
2 cups chopped pretzels (optional, highly suggested though not attempted)

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees, as usual. Like your 9 x 13 pan with parchment paper- you will thank yourself later for this step.

Cream the butter and peanut butter together, adding the sugars and mixing until it is all fully incorporated. Next, add the eggs one at a time followed by the vanilla.

In another bowl mix together the flour and baking soda. Gradually add this dry mixture to the wet mixture and combine until it is all gloriously intermingled. Toss in 1/3 of the chopped chocolate (about 5 ounces or 2/3 cup). Use a rubber spatula to clean down the sides of the bowl and make sure everything is mixed together well.

Now,  the best part and the reason I went with bars instead of cookies, dump the whole thing into the prepared pan and spread around with a butter knife or a spatula. Bake for 22-27 minutes, or until the edges are a nice golden color and a toothpick inserted comes out relatively clean (I prefer to under-bake my goodies so they retain their moist chewiness, which means that I let a few crumbs slide onto the toothpick and call it done, which was about 24 minutes in my kind of super hot oven).

Finally, take the leftover chocolate and melt it in a double boiler over simmering water until all the chocolate is melted. Then, pour the melted chocolate over the cooled bars, spreading it all evenly around as best you can. Here is my great idea I have yet to try, put crumbled pretzels on the top after you pour the chocolate- I imagine this would be divine! I'm going to try this next time. Let this chill in the fridge until the chocolate hardens, about 2 hours or pop them in the freezer if you need them faster. They are best cut up when the chocolate is hard, but closer to room temperature or it will crack. Cut up and serve at room temperature.

Enjoy!
-m